Thor's blog

Verdeee!

2007-06-26T11:05:00.000-05:00

No mamiblu!, tiene como año y medio que no escribo en el blog tza!
Han pasado mil - 8 mil cosas y sin embargo todo sigue tal cual jajap

A retomar... untz!

Chimes.

Nativitas & Neues Jahre & 4 Magos

2006-01-06T11:52:00.000-06:00

Hier liege ich die sogennante Photos von das Ende des Jahre 2005:

Pops & Mom

Abue & Me

Reynous kids & pars

Parchado en una esquina de Navitat!

Ultra jet-on

Sabroxo!

Jaz & Pax!

Egga et moi.

Los kung-fu kids

Neues Jahre!

Vino mi amá, mi apá, mi agüe y mi manito juas juas.

Nos echamos un pavin sabroxin!

Macalleation sabrotion motion.

Peponation avec le Panchirrinchi con los giocos y las chompus.

Todo superrrrerrrrechidirri.

Jajaja. Salux!

San Antonio SPURS - NBA champions

2005-12-07T12:50:00.000-06:00

Last weekend I enrolled on a journey with 3 fellas: Dorian, Richard and Oscar...
I'd never go out with them, but the opportunity came when Richard approached me and said:
"Wanna go see the spurs?"

Spurs vs. Sixers good game! I finally got a glimpse of San Antonio and its suburbs. Very good game.

Giovas - Mayra - Pax - Marcel - Moi @ Austin.TX

2005-11-14T16:46:00.000-06:00

Last weekend was my 28 birthday :) and Pax and Marcel came to Reynosa!
We decided to make a trip to Austin, where Giovanni and Mayra are currently living, to visit and get to know the place.

We visited New Braunfels, a german Town located between San Antonio and Austin.

We dwelled insde the campus of the University of Austin, we ate giant burguers at Hickory's. It was a great trip. The first I make with my brother and Marcelo together in the US :) I'll never forget it.

Tayrona

2005-11-07T12:29:00.000-06:00

Magdalena, Colombia. Fünf Tage bliebte ich mit meiner Liebe Diana, ins Tayrona Feld, am Strand des Meer, neben den alten Bergen, die nicht weit vor Heilige Martha Stadt dastehen. Die sogenannte Fotos habe ich noch nicht gerastert, um das schöne visuelles Teil zu zeigen; aber gefühlenweise sollen Sie sicher ins Herz gekommen, dass ich ganz zufrieden bin.

... geht's weiter...

Déja news...

2005-10-13T21:15:00.000-05:00

Estos últimos días han habido movimientos locochones de inquilinos en la casa :)

Ernesto se mudó finalmente a unas 3 cuadras de distancia, con toda su familia. La casa que alquila está chida y bastante amplia...
Llegó Jose Manuel de Tampico, para sustituir a Mónica que se fué finalmente a Cd. del Carmen, con su marido Jose Arcadio, su hija y la abuelita doña María. Ya son carmelos...
La siguiente semana vino otro chavo de Tampico, Jose Gerardo, a sustituir a Oswaldo que aún no regresaba de su incapacidá-vacación-curso (3 meses fuera).
Una semana después renunció JM entrando a Pemex como ingeniero de diseño, y JG se tuvo que quedar 2 semanas más.
Esta semana renuncia Oswaldo, para irse a estudiar un curso para entrar a un MBA en los iunaites...
Así que voy a estar de a solapín en la haus jajaja :) A la banda que le quiera caer, pues hay bastante lugar, mientras no me corran por exceso de espacio :P

Fuí a ver a Santana hace semana y media. Estuvo mega rifa-da-les. Nomás le faltó tocar samba pa miguelin y europa pero de ahí en juera son unos masters. Dennis Chambers en la alineación, ahi nomás.

Le abrió Robert Randolph, que toca un blues bien ameno con guitarra horizontal y slide. Primera vez que lo escuché, pero me hice fan. Highly recomendable. Le da un aire musical a Ben Harper. Nomás que si canta bastante merol. Lo más rifado fué que los musiciens se turnaron tocando todos los instruments! Y todos se la rifaban tocando como si fueran masters del instrument en cuestión. Digno de verse! Niaaa ;)

Este fin me lanzo pa Morelia, a ver a mis primos, tíos y hangear harto con la family :) Espero poder sacar el lunes mi licencia sempiterna en el defectuoso.

Ya le entré a las clases de baile y estamos ahora con el merengue. Está hiper cabrón, no me sale el invitado especial con el que se podrían hacer esos movimientos... ah que la chinga. Espero llevar a Alice próximamente a que mueva esa caderita jeje :)

Eunice tuvo dengue. Estuvo gacho. Se gastó un varo porque no tenía seguro médico. Pero ya está bien. Salieron hoy pal Cervantino. Las fuí a dejar al ADOpuerto. Alice está más friendly que nunca... pero ya la solté. A lo mejor por eso... :P

El puente de noviembre, me lanzo a Barranquilla., Col. a ver a la chuquis. Espero poder conocer Santa Marta y el parque Tayrona que me quedé con ganas. Ya está todo presto, espero no haya punes de último momento. Pinches viajes express se están volviendo modus vivendi.

Todo va viento en Blog.

Le estoy dedicando harto al japonés, espero próximamente convertir éste en un multi-lang-blog. Ya descubrí como escribir caracteres bizarros!

こちらは　ちみです。

pd. No poseo digi-cam, como saben algunos, murió en una peda, asi que las images tardaran un leve...

Mi guajirita :)

2005-09-21T20:53:00.000-05:00

Niña hermosa: (frag.)

Voy a tratar
de incorporarme en estas letras,
de infundir fé por medio de ellas,
dejar, plasmar fortuitamente,
una opinión sin darte cuenta.

Así sutil como a conciencia,
permear en tí dulce, inocente,
ferviente sueño, una experiencia,
que el corazón amplíe y refleje.

Que bulla en tí añil el brío,
que siento al ser de voz, amante,
concupiscente y parco, altivo,
forjado en celo, altisonante.

Una palabra que en tu oído,
en un instante se haga vasta,
haga tornar sílaba en libro,
y que perturbe el alma casta.

Suscite dignidad ninguna,
desvista tal pueril decoro,
y con pasión la historia inscriba,
de palmo a palmo en letra de oro.

Pasión y ansia correspondan,
al corazón, cuando en tu pecho,
el alma pida el celo a gritos
al recorrer el mismo trecho.

De todas las sombras que vi nacer,
sin duda me quedo con la de su mercé.

Hm-E/G

Colombia!

2005-09-08T19:05:00.000-05:00

¿Qué más hermano? Miremos y de pronto nos devolvemos pa su tierra, fresco que ya regresamos...

Tierra donde abunda el oro, las esmeraldas (75% producción mundial), el café (buenérrimo) y las mujeres hermosas...

Ahhh... No hay palabras para describir el bien que me hizo este viaje... estuve muy de buenas como diría Angie :) Bacanísimo.

Bogotá es una ciudad impresionantemente parecida a la ciudá de México. Grandes avenidas, rodeada de montañas, clima y altitud semejantes (2700 m.s.n.m), centro colonial, sitios popof, barrios bobres, parques grandes, áreas universitarias y zonas estudiantiles, hartos rumbeaderos, malls, bancos, como mil millones de busetas y flotillas (acá peseros), además de taxis amarillos, y una muy buena cantidá de rolos y rolas (de la capital) deambulando por las calles. La inseguridá se respira en algunos lugares, como debe ser; la rumba se respira en muchas más. Bolívar en la plaza principal, mirando hacia el horizonte como suelen representar los artistas a estos personajes...

En Santa Fé de Bogotá conocí el Museo del Oro, la Candelaria (centro histórico), el parque nacional, la iglesia de Montserrate, la Fragata, Andrés Carne de Rés en Chía (donde perdí jaja), la 7, la 19, la 70, la 133, 9, 120, la circunvalar!, fuí a la Calera a andar a caballo :), en fin, Angie me dió una muy buena paseada... comí arepas, ajiaco, patacón, zancocho, bandeja paisa, cazuela de mariscos, pescado frito, arroz con coco, yuca, tomé canelazo (aguardiente con panela), vino caliente, néctar azul, ron, cerveza club colombia, águila, etc... En Zipaquirá fuí a visitar la catedral de sal que está increíble, y que siendo geólogo me provoca un poco más... jeje
Aparte del curso, en el que conocí a varios cmpñrs colombianos, venecos y ecuatorianos, hice buenas migas con una chica de Malasia. Ya Nur Alizaa!

En Cartagena de Indias fué rebane total... Rumba en chiva por la ciudad amurallada, con grupo de vallenato en vivo (la caja, acordeón y la guacharaca), las Islas del Rosario, donde tuve la oportunidad de snorkelear por el arrecife (mega chingón), el volcán de lodo del Totumo y la ciénaga, la playa de Bocagrande, Manzanillo, El Laguito, la catedral de San Pedro, plaza de Santo Domingo, las esculturas de Botero, una casa de Gabriel García Márquez, en fin...

La noche que salí a rumbear en chiva, conocí a una pareja interesante y poca madre (Cris y Martial) costeña y francés respectivamente, con los que anduve rumbeando esa noche en TuCandela...

En Barranquilla, conocí el amor de mi vida... Diana, mi media naranja :) la chica que quiero que sea mi mujer jajaja :)

Faltan las fotos...

Mi sisterna...

2005-08-09T18:41:00.000-05:00

Seamos entonces hermanos,
asi podré seguirte amando
sin generar más confusión
así podré bien protegerte
enseñarte todo lo que sé
sin ninguna desilusión.

Podrás contarme lo que piensas, lo que sientes,
de cualquier cosa sin fijarte
en qué me afecta o si me duele.

Y así tendremos parentesco,
aunque riñamos, no estaremos más lejanos,
podré visitarte sin pretextos,
cantar contigo, presumir de tu hermosura,
halagarte y regalarte sin más razón, sin preguntar,
porque serás mi hermana y te procuro.

Porque podré demostrarte cuánto te amo,
sin desprenderme de tí ni de nadie,
y no habrá quien te cuestione demasiado,
si acostumbras salir con familiares.

Y tu belleza estará en mi sangre,
y todo mi amor estará en la tuya,
y las horas que vivamos juntos,
será porque ambos queremos
y no tendrás remordimiento
de contarme lo que anhelas.

Y si algo necesitaras,
no dudarás en pedírmelo,
en hablarme a cualquier hora,
en confiar en mí y decírmelo.

Y yo estaré feliz aunque te vayas,
porque te dí todo y lo aceptaste,
y seguirás feliz cuando me dejes,
pues sabrás que estaré aquí cuando regreses.

Y mis celos tendrán base y sustento,
serán usados con soltura y rectamente,
Por el bien de tu futuro cualquier cosa,
el apoyo que requieras de repente.

Y en las noches de infortunio y pena,
podrás llorar conmigo, en mi hombro,
que veré yo las estrellas que en tus ojos,
nos darán la solución como a menudo.

Y podrás hablarme vida en sentimiento,
de alegrías, de tristezas y rencores,
de silencio, de miradas, de caricias,
desamores y querellas en tu nombre.

Y si intento propasarme sin medida,
abrazarte y arrancar un beso de tus labios,
me reprocharás todo por mi bien,
me reprocharás toda la vida,
por querer así a tu hermana demasiado.

Y lo mío será tuyo, mientras orgullosa aceptes.
Y lo tuyo será tuyo, porque así son los hermanos.

HMEG 2005

Verbum sapienti sat

2005-08-07T21:26:00.000-05:00

But I am not wise, I'm restless.

I saw it coming from afar and ... did nothing to prevent it.
The feeling of your heart as it shrinks nut-size and you hold your blood so still while gaping for an instant in eternity.... in awe.

Who wants to be wise when failure is the best thing ever?
When you do what you have to do, what you feel is right and things come undone... :-)

Voilá!

2005-08-07T21:21:00.000-05:00

Irma and me
outside Sam's.

Die Matacuaces Brethren

2005-07-21T09:03:00.000-05:00

We had one hell of a weekend - a four day weekend :)

Ted, Berns, Chang and Pax arrived early on Friday. They made the walk home all the way from the bus station.
After giving them the keys, directions and all, Enet and I hit the road to PEP.
That very morning, the P-sindicate had blocked access to every building at the complex.
Wide-eyed with mouth agape Net & I came back home with the wonderful news...

"Cheered up dudes ransacked the supermarket for meat, beer et sim."
So we prepared an awesome BBQ outside the ville.
The grill had been outside for about 6 months and was rusty as hell...
I cleaned it with a special brush, onion and a couple of lemons.
No wonder the food tasted funny afterwards.

Bursting with coal and newspaper, the bottom of the grill box began to crumble.
One last time it held through.

Loads of ribs, steaks, sausages, onions & quesadillas, along with several buds.

After the meal, the bottom of the grill collapsed, but our tummies were happy.
Later I brought down the Risk game (tm), which Chang knew by heart how to play and
so we learned.

That night a few of our local buddies came home with beers and we jammed 'till 3 am :)
------------

Saturday was shopping day. We visited several computer deal stores. Off we left with two new laptops for two old chicks .)
Berns bought his iPod thus entering the iClub. Chang bought a couple of t-shirts at the Mall.
Pax got a voice recorder for Mom and a couple of gadgets.
Ted as usual did not buy a thing.

Afterwards it rained. We barely arrived to the restaurant when it began to pour. They loved the Chinese buffet btw.
We went to the music shop and banged on some of the instruments there, while pondering at the not so cheap prices. Restraining myself on buying an 8 channel console which winked feverously at me...
We dwelled in the library. I bought the 'Elements of style' pocket book - neat!! (highly recommended)
------------

Sunday we went to SPI girl watching... Beers, swimming, bodysurfing... great!
We swallowed a pair of giantic delicious radiactive pizzas at the Pizza joint, and headed back home where we had another Risk fight for domination.
------------

Monday we had for breakfast a bunch of hot dogs,
then mcallened to get the tax money manifesto thingy taken care of.
Back home we played Halo - split screen tournament - with rockets and sniper.
Jammed a little bit more and hit the ADOport :)
It was Pichin's birthday. Happy birthday dude! We missed ya .P

3me Arrondissement...

2005-07-04T09:28:00.000-05:00

Un tres jolie weekend...

Samedi, I bought (jeje) graduated sunglasses - Alice chose 'em. They were expensive but they are very cool. Al bought a zillion creams and shampoo's, for her sister n' mom. She tried some red lip gloss she'd bought, god she looked so hot. Then we went to a very nice tex-mex restaurant, where we had some of the best if not the best 'tostitos' we've both ever tasted. The food was awesome too, plenty and not expensive. Al was happy. I saw her smiling, more than usual.

We went to see her mom who's staying in Dustyland for the holidays. I met her younger sister. They're most amiable. It felt good to share that time with them, four sisters and their mother, with a complete stranger, who's trying to get into the family because he's so in love with one of her daughters. And Eu gave me a ride on her recently acquired van :)

hmm how love makes me want to write, but also makes me forget things quickly...

Dimanche, I spent the whole day at Jose's backyard, in the swimming pool, a big steak, morcilla, cooked salty potatoes hmmmm - everything was great and very relaxing. He's back in Crime City for this week. Good luck man!

Mood: Sleepy after lunch...

Doom!

2005-06-18T21:21:00.000-05:00

Ok, I'm starting to get in shape... or at least I'm trying to hehe
Going every day to the gym is kinda exhausting to the body.
Today I slept almost all day played Doom 3 on the box.
I'm a quicksave freak I admit it!

The 2.2 Ballistic kite finally arrived!
It looks great, it even comes with it's own cool bag.
Just need to find a wide area to test it :)

Tomorrow at dusk I'll head towards Monterrey to go biking in Chipinque national park. Let's see how it goes... hopefully I'll wake up at 5 am. I think I'll use the highway to get there faster and... safer.

Yesterday Ale was very angry with me, cause I didn't pick up her hubby from the airport.
Perhaps it was the way I said it, perhaps it was something else going on. Still, she's way mad.
She even sent me a very dramatic kindof 'endoftheworld-thanksforeverything' message...
Whatever. I apologized, but mayhaps it wasn't enough. She's going on vacation 2 weeks to Deutschland.

On other issues, OT grimly told us that starting Monday next week, only 5 of us will be at the office (we're 13 usually). The other guys get temporary vacation. What will happen in the next couple of months? Who knows. We sense some great changes coming through.

The last two weeks a girl from the IMP City of Crime arrived for a course at UPMP in Reynosa.
Alice made a great friend. It was as if they'd known each other for a long time. I could tell she's in need of friends like that. :) I was glad I took them to the cinema and to eat (Al's request) We had a great time. She flew back home today.

I'm almost done with Mattieu Ricard's book, just to start another by the same author. I'm remembering my rusty russian with the pimsleur courses my bro handed to me. The old pycckuu engine is starting to turn xopowo!

AGS rocks! I'm reading all tutorials and soon enough will make a test for my first educational video game hehe. It's a lot of fun.

- Ditto

Bamboleiooooo bamboleiaaaa!

2005-06-08T10:56:00.000-05:00

Pa su madre!

Ayer fuimos al concierto de los Gipsy Kings aca en Hgo, TX y estuvo de güevos!!!
Presentaron el nuevo material del disco "Back to our roots".
Un ritmo de pocamais y un sonido inigualable jajaja.
Al final tocaron Djobi djoba y Bamboleo pero les falto Volare ;-)

Estoy yendo toujours al gym avec Alizee... Tou va bien, mon corps esta tullido y adolorido mamón, pero es un dolor placentero "iykwim" - - -

IA está rara lately. IMHO entró en un estado de confusión respecto a nuestra amistad y el hecho de que sabe lo que siento por ella, lo que afecta nuestra relación. O igual ella es así - o maybe es otro factor...
Como sea, me estoy acostumbrando a sus arranques de mal genio jaja. Le estoy enseñando a manejar "estándar", según ya sabía conducir automático, pero por lo que noté le falta bastante experiencia - (que no me lea jeje) - no sabe pasar topes, ni seguir señalización for the love of God.
El otro día fuimos a ver una muvi de romance, y pues me sentí inclinado a creer que era una indirecta o algo así. Digo si una chica te invita a ver una película romántica, que puede uno pensar no? De cualquier manera, me dijo después que esa no era su intención. Aunque nunca me lo dice personalmente (bla!) Who knows? Yo siento que tengo un ápice de oportunidad...

El fin passé me lanssé con le Marcel Marceau a Laredo-Nuevo Laredo. Cruzamos la frontera como 6 veces jaja. Pobre mono le afectó mucho el factor calor. Estaba como Demóstenes: sufro, sufro... sufro jeje. Ibamos a ir a Saint Anthony, pero le negaron el permiso los ojeis de migración. Ah. También anduvimos por la Falcon Dam, del lado gabacho. Chido el lugar para acampar.

Y. va a Tampico. Bello y hermoso. Le debo una ida al cine, pero me he estado haciendo pedazos. Ha sido la más chida conmigo, muy buen pex. Le debo una historia que algún día contaré.

KiTeBoArDiNg!

2005-05-26T15:47:00.000-05:00

Well, Episode III rocked :) No more comments hahaha.

I'm going through a slight painless regression,
back to old gaming days. Got myself an Xbox, finished Fable in a week :)
Acquired Doom3 platinum edition - now I'm talking like a true freak - it's got Ultimate Doom inside!
'been playing classic guitar, that I haven't done for some time.
Finally learned the friggin' pink panther theme intro on sax :)
and my good ol' sweet accordion playing is in progress...

Recently I got very interested in Kiteboarding, this Sunday I'm gonna take my first lesson in Laguna Madre at South Padre Island. After reading myriads (well, dozens haha) of pages on the subject, and having watched a bunch of surfers glide on the sea surface, I became enthralled with the sport. So let's see how it goes on Sunday and mayhaps I'll get my gear soon enough. Pour some blessings on my person please...

This Saturday hopefully I'll find tickets for Monterrey Metal Fest II. 14 hours of pure Metal!! I'll finally get to see Jag Panzer, Danzig, Hammerfall live!

I've made good friends with Alice and Eu, they are so charming and unpredictable. Haha. I'm finally crazy after all this love. The cornucopia of presents I am, not anymore.

The fact that maybe I'll be transferred soon enough adds a flavoured twist to all my activities here in Dustyland. I'm trying to get the most out of everything.

Btw, der Nahual finally comes back from the port See the cross, just to grab his things and head for Yummy Pond after 5 years of living here in Dustyland. Saturday night gives his goodbye party at our place. Will I be able to wake up Sunday morning?

Two guys at the office just quitted. We got a new contract (hmmmm) and everything is cloudy as to who's gonna stay and do what. Change is imminent and good as well (bdaaaaa!)

I'll post some photos on recent events ASAP

Oda a tu corazón.

2005-04-24T21:23:00.000-05:00

Alicia e Irma son una misma como el agua
es río, mar y lluvia a su albedrío.
Brevemente separadas por espacio en el papel,
un silencio entre palabras, la distancia entre dos letras
y un sonido muy sutil a cierta ciencia en desnivel.

Me refiero a una ya la otra en armonía,
cuan distinta o similar vida en semblanza,
si en belleza ya la una es utopía,
pues la otra es en carácter añoranza.

Su sonrisa es el misterio más cautivo,
que en sus labios tan alegre se dibuja,
pues no sabes si sonríen por alegría
o sólo por ser amables a tu alma.

Con violencia así me invade la locura que provoca
que mi corazón de un vuelco al sentir la euforia en sí,
de tenerla tan presente, que el presente es permanente,
cuya estela tan sonriente hoy me sorprende al soñar.

Ese gesto confabula con sus ojos,
cuando miran de soslayo mis reproches y esperanza de quererla así y amar,
no hay estadio en el que muera o viva la existencia al descubierto,
de esta flama sempiterna, que no tuvo despertar.

Esta niña es la mujer que afirma el mundo,
gran visión meditabunda me provoca en sí al andar,
pues va más allá del sueño superando expectativas,
ya que era más que esperanza: un grave bosquejo del alma.

Tan sólo con su mirada fortalece mi existencia,
Arropando en mi inconsciente inusitado bienestar,
Y que forja con mi sangre esa certeza que bien nace
al entregar la vida por amor, la más noble y bella causa,
la virtud y la humildad que no provoca tal honor!

Si en el tono de su tez así tan blanca es, su silueta,
debía ser un gran poeta si quisiera describir,
y en la oscuridad pudiera su semblante distinguir,
cuyo andar de buen talante de la sien la pulcritud
Por enojo caminante, tan sapiente senectud.

Es la llama de la vela que engrandece así mis ojos
y la lluvia que ferviente su ventana golpetea,
perpetuando ese vaivén de la tormenta,
que se acrecenta luego al otro lado del cristal...

Luz y sombra que las ve y las proyecta,
levemente emancipada y dulcemente predilecta
derramada con lágrimas en mis manos,
por la tinta que informó en líneas, su ser.

- Mimes 2005

2005-04-19T19:31:00.000-05:00

Valex, Irma and me

About a girl...

2005-04-19T19:12:00.000-05:00

(dramatization) [snare-hi-bass-hi-snare-hi-crash] ...

Alice I fell in love with at a party in November, just before Arce and I became a couple. It was love at first sight. It'd never happened to me before and we connected in such a way. Chemistry in full blown action. Everything was perfect. We were both a little high on booze tho. I made a decision afterwards, and I like to ponder whether it was the right one, but it doesn't matter anymore... I stayed with Arce. And it was the way my heart was pulling me... it was supposed to be like that I guess. Later, when we broke, I came back looking for Alice... It wasn't the same tho. She obviously thought I didn't value her at the time, that she was the second option, ... she was very sore at me.
Who knows? Sometimes I think I'm cursed, sometimes I think I'm blessed... prolly it's not what I'm meant to do. I like to believe that, I really do. Little do I know what I do show I know without being phony about it.

So this month it was all about Alice. Visits to her house, long talks with her and her sister Eu (they live together). Going out once in a while.
Singing my guitar for her, bringing her small presents, getting to know her. Learning a lot :)
One thing I didn't like is that after a while of being together I started to be quite phony with her. It wasn't easy for me to hang out with her. She didn't made it easier. She was very straight forward and all but you could tell she didn't like me around much. Maybe I was trying too hard. Once I brought my guitar to her place, and started singing. Just for the hell of it. I thought, 'Boy, she's gonna enjoy it'. She did, but suddenly she asked me: 'So why did you come _here_ to play guitar? Just because you like to play guitar?' Almost like 'Who let you in?'. But she did enjoy it nonetheless, imho. You could tell. So I felt a little nervous and very out of place and (gosh yeah) without losing my crumby politeness said: 'Yep. Just for the hell of it, waddya know? Lemme sing for you a bit more and then... Scram.'
She could be mean and icy, just like the girl in The Beatles' song. The guitar wasn't even my idea, it was her sister's. *Blush* Her sister Eu is on my side btw, she is helping me achieve my 'enterprise' for Chrissake! Everyone is helping me, even her friends! What a moron I am!

She never said anything 'nice' now that I recall. She _was_ nice but she neither complimented or else. She isn't that way tho. She smiled a lot and was patient with me. I noticed that. It wasn't much of a comfort. Almost as if she'd nothing better to do. But, her smile was enough nonetheless, for a while. She was honest. And she knew about her smile, and her eyes. She played with them.

Yesterday she told me it was all over. Her ex-boyfriend made her a visit and they had this 'conversation'...
so it appears that they're a couple again, or at least almost for certain. She is pretty sure of that and the way she said it
I realize I don't figure at all in her plans (did I ever?).

She started by saying 'Did I once tell you about my first boyfriend, the one who lasted like 1 year 8 months? (yeah, _like_ 1 year 8 months). Well, he has a stable job in Pemex, a house, ... all that cr*p (that's the first thing she mentioned!) It's ok I guess, she wants to settle. 1st priority. Her family lives nearby, her world is here, who knows...
He is like 8 years older than she (boy I thought I was the gramps, I'm 4 years older) and she told me,
very nicely and cool btw, how he wanted to marry her after two years of being together... but at that time she hadn't finished school and all, and she was 19. So she freaked out and left him. I probably would've done the same... hmm yeah sure.

In the words that followed she didn't show the least emotion. I mean, like if she was talking about the weather or something. Man was I worried. She was smiling all the time, but I've come to the conclusion that her smile is now and then like a polite japanese smile, not because she's happy or anything. I was worried because mayhaps it was very difficult for her to show her feelings and I was worried also because maybe she didn't have any feelings whatsoever while she dispatched me. It wasn't difficult for her. You could tell. She simply said 'Well, I think that's it. Thank you for the soap and all (I'd brought her orange blossom soap, my last kick!) We'll still see each other in social events and parties you know' - What the hell was that? -'I'm telling you so you won't be surprised that maybe next week you hear - Alice's got a boyfriend or so' Man it made me way sad but I didn't feel like crying. I stared. She didn't reach out to hug me or anything. I felt sorry for her in a way, then I felt sorry for me. What am _I_ doing here? I kissed her goodbye. I didn't ever felt like kissing her lips for a change.

I actually felt happy for her, because she was excited about the whole thing and all. I kept saying... 'Err... well good luck with your ex-boyfriend, I think it's pretty cool that you come back together. Oh girl! He was your first boyfriend, that's a lot ain't it?' while I touched her back - paternally. Then I climbed on my bycicle and left. I can be very phony sometimes.

I wasn't even mad. I was kind of dissapointed. But I felt liberated in the sense that I need'nt worry any more. She can do what she wants for all I care. I even pictured her living with me in a dream, thinking of what would've been if she'd returned to her old boyfriend. Her first love. Then I realized I wasn't in love with her at all. Not anymore. But that thing you don't wanna know unless you've got nothing left to lose. That's how selfish I can be...

She likes to read. She's specially fond of horror and sci-fi tales. Poe, Lovecraft and Asimov. I bought her a couple of books - by two favorites (Castaneda & Dan Brown). She hasn't read 'em though. No big deal. She 'joked' and asked me if I wanted them back. That killed me. I said in this 'try to be cool' voice: 'No way you keep them, they're yours :-)' That depressed me helluvalot. She also wanted to return the soap to me haha. People returning presents or asking them back is way depressing. Well I know people who would've asked for the books back and made a scene.

I haven't finished her poem. It's one of the most troublesome poems I've ever tried to write. It just won't come out well. I mean, I have pieces. I just can't make up my mind. You know the thing about writing all those poems is that if your mood shifts, the poem does the same. You don't like some passages in it anymore. You have to take into account every goddamn mood! A shapeshifter. It is also protean (at least a stylish word) in style and form (I like to talk as if I know some of lit shit where I don't) - corny poem. I'll post it soon enough for you to criticize I hope.

...and I'll wash my mind with the 'desire means suffering' buddhist medikit horse manure and try to do other things like fall in love one more time... It kills me.

(read The Catcher in the Rye by J.D.Sallinger) - good book!

Another one bites the blog!

2005-03-27T20:54:00.000-06:00

Whoa! Long time no blog!

It's been almost a month since my last blog. Mainly I think it was because of vacations and Muse absentions...

Nevertheless, many things have happened:

*Saw my family from Michoacan, whom I had not seen in quite a long time (more than 2 years)
*Saw my cousines from Michoacan, whom I had not seen in quite a long time (my god, they've grown beatiful) *wroooagh* ivol merol!
*Finally watched Pulp-fiction & Reservoir dogs hehe Not what I've expected, but altogether entertaining. I think Dobermann is best.
*Watched Hellboy, 't was ok, didn't know it had to do with Lovecraft fiction somehow. That was cool.
*Watched Riddick, a great movie! Gothic science fiction, I don't know. I liked it very much.
*My brother came to spend a few days with me. It was cool :-) We ate fajipapas, carl's junior burgers and crazy chicken yum yum! He bought a compaq for Jazz, nice machine. I was able to play the latest 'Kain & Raziel' game, which btw doesn't run on my lap. I've been thinking to acquire one of them pc's they cheaper now them god puters...
*Saw good old John Batteries, whom I had not seen also for more than 2 years. He went to Paris, humbly, um seine Master im IFP zu kompletieren.
*Had a hell of a punky Fart (feminine) with John, Cesar, Mike, Pichin, Changui, Panch & Tedy. We played 'bullshit' like retards and Pichin & Changui lost (literal).
*Yahd has told me a lot of things about her life, lots of information. I wonder... where I'm standing.
*Alice went on vacation to my old defective town. It was a good oportunity to be with her and go sightseeing side by side, but my moronic self decided to stay here at the very last moment. Sh*t happenz! Her birthday is near... where should I take her? Dude, where's my car?!!
*Started reading a book which is a dialogue between and astrophysicist and a buddhist monk about the origin of things and what lies beyond things (aka phaenomenon and noumenon). Very interesting.
*Also started reading 'In cold blood', by Truman Capote. That's a famous one... Starts very well.
*A couple of days ago went to pick up some cash and der Nagual and I went nuts at the music store and bought a Trumpet and a Sax respectively. It's a used Selmer Bundy. I also bought a couple of books to start fiddling with it. Goddamn thing you have to take into account a lot of sh*t! Blurted out my first notes tho! Cool. After reading and reading I decided to go back to my good old accordion and finish that method first hahaha.

Visions of love & hate, a collage behind my eyes...

2005-03-02T18:23:00.000-06:00

Regret - One of my favorite songs from Anathema... Thanks Uncle Pepas!

I just bought a live concert - I'll bring it home a.s.a.p.

I invited Alice for lunch tomorrow, I plan to cook some white rice and chicken milanesas, *sigh* still got a big issue to solve with her. Hope everything comes out just fine.

Yahd is all over me. She says she wants to go dancing. At Mura's goodbye party we danced quite a lot like crazy dopes. It feels weird but she's been the nicest around.

Been talkin' writin' doing' all like a robot...

King Crimson

2005-02-22T18:40:00.000-06:00

Try Crimson for a change... I was astounded!
Looking forward to meet 'Yes' in a nutshell.

Debería de dejar de hacerme daño, pero...
I still have the flavour of love in the back of my tongue...

This is the picture which I used to make her portrait.

Poza York - Überraschung!

2005-02-18T16:22:00.000-06:00

Eine Woche im Poza York um zu arbeiten, kann das Leben stark verändert... oder nicht. Alles klar ist es bekommt...

Now I believe in blindness and numbness of awe. Freedom and enlightenment come through in waves, although sleepiness is never gone. 'Paradigm enhanced, vision entranced' quoting a lost verse from the past...

Tomorrow I part home. I'm taking something else with me and leaving more behind, therefore changed to the bone... but my skeleton is still complete, and that is which allows me to move on... always moving on...

Wrooooooagh!!

2005-02-14T18:56:00.000-06:00

It's Feb 14th, and I just broke with my girl...

My head is spinning, yet I am peaceful...

First part of the sonnets, which even written before,
bear some part of the truth...

Sonnets of Hopeless Grief & Joy
(fragment...)

I stand in sublime awe under the sky,

In wonder woven tiled melancholy,

a dazzling blissful kiss holding me high,

the sweetest loving breeze caressing me…

My heart in tenderness glow spiritual,

Deluding troubled mind, wind, wobble ponds,

Of sadness bleak concealed deep in the aisle,

That runs through barren bonds between dream folds.

The trends that follow paths pythagorean,

Aloft stir scarce a soul pandaemonium,

mould brittle thoughts of transient troops protean,

and hollow pack my gourd with trifle stone.

Enraptured, poised by seeing how feelings flow,

A timeless crimson-blue and dazzling joy.

Mimes 2005

Dreh dich um, dreh dich um in den Sturm...

2005-02-10T18:24:00.000-06:00

Mura flies on Sunday to Crime City. Transferred...

The first link is broken... The chain evolves...

I'm using the bike again, after a 3-month brake. I had forgotten how much fun it was...
I'll be looking forward to make a trip to Mission, TX one of these weekends...
Gotta get in shape again...

King's book I ate in a dash... Going for the second volume. But first, gonna read Arce's recommendation: 'The Roadshow' by Gary Jennings. Got the e-book ;-)

In the background things glide by themselves and seem to outrun some of us...
Detachment... is my only salvation. I really don't want to be saved.
Suffering, a part of me is.

It's thesis completion and graduation time for many people I know...
We finish yet we begin. Some of us never finish. Some never begin...

This criptic humor is due to my longing state. I wish I could have the girl I love right by my side, tell her how much I love her, and how everything is going to be allright. Just like the three little birds... Man I love that song.

I've learned some new chords on the guitar. By singing a song I never thought I would sing, and which has become of so much significance to me. Thank you girl, for teaching me...

Tomorrow is my project presentation. Hope everything goes smoothly. Gotta practice tonight.

I have been made to love and enjoy... and that is what I do enjoy the best and love the most.

Blau Himmel - Rote Erde

2005-02-07T22:27:00.000-06:00

A nice picture of my bro and meself,
chichenitzing through, pretending to be cool.

I sent an e-mail to a very good old friend,
who's studying in England,
whose other brother is in Australia,
whose other brother is back in my old town in Mexico,
and just came to realize it!! aha! Ppph!!

Btw - I miss Arce very very very much!
Wrrroagh! *weep* Love you baby!!

Transmogrified

2005-02-04T13:49:00.000-06:00

Thoughts change, ideas change, trust changes, love changes.
People endure. How can you lose someone to whom no one belongs?

Why cry when truth is blatant, and sight so cruelly real?
What is left to do but accept the fact, the nature of change?
By my heart's ordeal, that will nor die nay rest.

Builders of the Mind

2005-02-03T15:02:00.000-06:00

Let this blog be the witness of my thoughts before things happen...

I'm in a state of apprehension... but I do not why...
I try to associate it with problems at work, my way of living, bad habits, what my girlfriend thinks, past encounters, ... but in the end I realize that my state is what turns this thoughts into problems which are not there at all.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm terrified deep inside... Of the unknown, but also I'm terrified to lose the 'caring' (essentially my girl's). And I try to calm my mind by 'undetaching myself' and then: a myriad of nightmares come forth and race through and past my eyes, the worst of them being that 'nothing happens at all'... Think about it, 'NOTHING HAPPENS AT ALL!'
Is that the meaning of loneliness?

On the other hand, I think of all that I have accomplished. There is such anguish in me when I think of losing something that I have achieved. It's HORROR! My heart beats furiosly at the thought of it.

I feel like I'm standing too close to the screen, and am not able to see the whole picture unless I scroll to the sides, up and down... that's a truly apprehensive thought...

Therefore be my witness, for I believe I'm in the verge of solving something grand, of discovering something outrageous, and thus become smaller in character and knowledge.

- OR perhaps it's because I drank 7 cups of black tea during the last 4 hours *boggle*

Unter dem Baum - auf dem Bett - Richtung Heimat...

2005-02-02T10:25:00.000-06:00

This is my room, blatantly frenzied... :-)

Just started 'The Gunslinger' ... bizarre.

Haven't heard from my baby... Maybe she's too busy, maybe her cel's out of credit, maybe she lost it, maybe something's not quite right... She hasn't answered my msgs.... hmm
I do not worry too much as her best friend is with her and her family... I hope everything's fine...

Pencil at work...

2005-02-01T14:05:00.000-06:00

This is her portrait, ma jolie Joues...

In the name of King Arthur... open the door!!

2005-02-01T11:33:00.000-06:00

Finished Brown's book (startling!), finished Arce's portrait, finished my project presentation, just started Siddharta auf Deutsch!!

I got a new goal and that is to finish a book every fifteen days... hmm hopefully :-)

Sonnet writing proves to be quite fun! I just finished the first one of a series...
The evolution within the poem is shocking! Every time I added or modified it I was influenced by different moods, and as it began blissful, it ended bizarre and surrealistic. I'll post it as soon as the whole set is complete...

Btw, this Shakespeare dude was such a genius! Check out this sonnet:

CXIII.



"Since I left you, mine eye is in my mind;

And that which governs me to go about

Doth part his function and is partly blind,

Seems seeing, but effectually is out;

For it no form delivers to the heart

Of bird of flower, or shape, which it doth latch:

Of his quick objects hath the mind no part,

Nor his own vision holds what it doth catch:

For if it see the rudest or gentlest sight,

The most sweet favour or deformed'st creature,

The mountain or the sea, the day or night,

The crow or dove, it shapes them to your feature:

Incapable of more, replete with you,

My most true mind thus makes mine eye untrue."



-- Voila :-)

Cartas en el asunto... (fragmento)

2005-01-28T13:23:00.000-06:00

"...mostraba la cepa del lerdo y concupiscente infortunio, quimera inocua de alabastro, talabarte desvencijado, agreste, proteico, de aprehensión moral sutil, parsimoniosa lejía, crasa arquitectura y condición epistémica falaz. Pueril decoro democrático, impertinente y fortuito, arquetipo fraguado por una apoplejía retórica, en un emblema primigenio, prístino, como un paliativo tácito de querellas y dolencias del subjetivo éter mundano.

La teocracia empero, adjudica la endemia a la usanza del fuero como antología peyorativa y denigratoria, certamen dialéctico entre el empirismo y la determinación a priori: La simultaneidad de la utopía pletórica circunscrita a un ápice de conciencia inmaculada.

Lánguida facies hipocrática y decimonónica, hito y presagio de un céfiro adusto; la renuencia congénita de un simbolismo opaco tergiversado por la historia como un improperio adjunto y silente, arduo epíteto calificativo, una convolución sintética en emancipación."

- Thor

Se trata de un estudio de vocabulario, jaja ya se me olvido que significa la mitad de lo que escribí...

Bolling & Rampal...

2005-01-26T16:16:00.000-06:00

Can you imagine a more romantic scene than a young, well-groomed man *tsk*, walking the highway on Friday's night through a sea of lights, dust and noise, throwing quick glances to avoid danger at all times, trying to reach the bus station on time while evading crazy-uneducated-drivers, crossing abandoned pot-smoking-bum-filled train rails and dirty water channel bridges, with a small backpack hanging from the shoulder, his guitar and case carried in one hand while the other holds a handful of presents, ready to make a 12 hour journey to visit his girlfriend who lives so far away he's just able to be with her one day and a half before he has to travel away back to work... :-)

She liked the flowers btw... And it's well worth it.

Been listening to Claude et Jean Pierre all day, the guys here at the office say it sounds like the Peanuts (tm) theme haha

I have read half of Dan Brown's bestseller, and it's been quite interesting... I feel enlightened in several topics...

My girl hmm I don't understand, but how I love her! Being away is hard and easy at the same time, if you know what I mean... Distance makes our get-together's really passionate, still I miss her so much when I'm away but I'm grateful for my freedom. I think she likes that too.

I miss my family and friends, I haven't been home for a while... I'm getting promoted soon too, hopefully. I don't get much spare time to think about other things rather than my family, my girlfriend, my job and working out, I haven't tried too hard tho... I have lost the habit of cooking also...

Sacrebleu!!

2005-01-21T17:39:00.000-06:00

Oh my god...

Arce says: Do you like her?
Thor says: Er.. well.. she's pretty.
You notice Arce Thor with sadness in her eyes.
Arce says: What?!
Thor pierced Arce's heart.
Arce slashed Thor across the face.
Thor missed Arce.
Arce poked Thor in the stomach.
Thor missed Arce.
Arce smashed Thor into small fragments.
shape Thor
Thor is in bad shape.
Thor takes a sip from a big healing potion.
Arce looks very sad.
Arce slashes Thor.
Thor missed Arce.
Arce hits Thor very hard.
Thor missed Arce.
shape Thor
Thor is in bad shape.
Thor drops an empty flask. It breaks as it hits the ground...
...

I miss mudding. Definitely it's one of the best games ever.
And if you die you only lose some stats and one level.

I hope I didn't break anything unrepairable...

Long time no blog!! haha

2005-01-19T11:10:00.000-06:00

Well, I took some vacation away from blogging - Bah! 1 week hahaha
... or is it the soothed furor initial the reason why...

Work has been tranquil and cumbersome not at all, with me focusing primarily on developing workflows and diagrams... time flies

Mura's mom came home and prepared our food for a good 2 weeks. Now that was peace at lunch.
We needn't preoccupy to cook or else... the rest of the time employed to rest... more! :-)

I've been spending much time composing & arranging & writing due to the high state of inspiration that hovers with me...

Still, as always, I don't manage to get things done or complete them... So let's focus

Let's focus for a while and let that change take place...

My naughty baby I love outrageously, tenderly, sparingly.
Beseech her frequently with kisses, hugs and sweet words...
"I love you Arce!" and hope it echoes into eternity.

Elf - Januar - Zufriedenheit!

2005-01-11T08:02:00.000-06:00

Aujourd'hui 'oui' cumplimos un Monat - Arce et moi... Et les mots pour decrire mes sentiments, je ne les peux pas trouver... Y menya une blissful countenance & I'm dreaming constamment...
Toujours...

Yesterday I learned how to write a sonnet, and began to write my first one...

Je l'aime...

First we take Manhattan... - LC

2005-01-07T10:02:00.000-06:00

Today I make a night run to see my girl to-morrow. Been waiting almost 15 days to be with her... again. That's how life's gonna be for me for a while, until things settle down or unsettle...

I keep wondering... when you are in love and you know you are loved, and you know that she knows that you love her, it's still a _need_ to confirm continuosly the feelings that you feel for each other... At the slightest doubt, you send a message and she sends a message, or you talk to her on the phone and you feel relieved and easy on yourself for a while, until the urge arises one more time... Somehow it's tiring, but is also a constant resource for happiness and joy. Part-time bliss... nonetheless. (btw 'you' is 'me' nevermind the metaphysical)

In other thoughts... I finally finished "Salem's Lot" by King. 'Tis a good novel, not as good as some people think, in my opinion... but definitely it has it's author signature... (as if I ever know ha ha)
I started the next book in the row, 'Da Vinci Code', and it starts pretty well, pretty well... (yes, I wrote that twice...) Let's see how it gets...

I'll prolly get une voiture irgendwann in Janvar... primero Dios, para dar el rol por el gabacho y loS urroundings... *tsk* *tsk*

Dia del geologo d8o)

2005-01-06T08:59:00.000-06:00

Vade retro!

Hoy es el dia del geologo.

Pensar en lo que eso significa... hmmmmmmmmmmmm
Ya!

Tambien es dia de reyes...

We had a piece of rosca and hot chocolate for breakfast.
Yummy yummy! Nothing in my shoe tho...

Trying to refresh a snapshot... and the db falls down. *boggle*

Project completion speed - set to full throttle...

Das Ende des Jahre 2004

2004-12-31T10:16:00.000-06:00

Happy new year!!
We finish yet we begin!

Recently I watched the movie Solaris during one of my fab bus runs, grasping through my drowsiness but only islands of the whole phylosophic & conceptual architecture... My curiosity stirred... Here is the poem by Dylan Thomas:

And Death Shall have No Dominion

And death shall have no dominion.
Dead men naked they shall be one
With the man in the wind and the west moon;
When their bones are picked clean and the clean bones gone,
They shall have stars at elbow and foot;
Though they go mad they shall be sane,
Though they sink through the sea they shall rise again;
though lovers be lost love shall not;
And death shall have no dominion.

And death shall have no dominion.
Under the windings of the sea
They lying long shall not die windily;
Twisting on racks when sinews give way,
Strapped to a wheel, yet they shall not break;
Faith in their hands shall snap in two,
And the unicorn evils run them through;
Split all ends up they shan't crack;
And death shall have no dominion.

And death shall have no dominion.
No more gulls cry at their ears
Or waves break loud on seashores;
Where blew a flower may a flower no more
Lift its head to the blows of the rain;
Though they be mad and dead as nails,
Heads of the characters hammer through daises,
Break in the sun till the sun breaks down.
And death shall have no dominion.

--- Dylan Thomas

Bent eye

2004-12-29T19:19:00.000-06:00

There is no such thing as nothing,
Everything is as it is.
I love to talk without talking,
I love to see with this bliss.

The sound of voice becomes amazing,
The sight of life a sight of dreams,
The touch of things feels overwhelming,
The smell of love, a silent kiss.

As I blend myself with you,
I can’t think about, I think along.
I lose the grasp from everything,
Everywhere, everytime, any day.

The way we do, the way me make,
The way we spare, the way we live.
We walk on the world,
And the world rolls under our feet.

My headache: the Truth, my dearest lie.
I follow my mind, I do not guide.
It shakes the surface around,
It changes, blurs, crystallizes.

And as I blend myself with you,
I hear the chant of your thoughts,
I glance there, light as air:
A flash of consciousness, and that’s enough.

From the corner of my bent eye,
I glimpse the answer.
I cannot tell, allowed only to remember,
I cannot tell what I have not seen.

JH 2002

Mots sur l’horizont du Sud et danese:

2004-12-29T18:45:00.000-06:00

"Ego consisto devant de mis queridos Fratres: uridu-quiero, con la ayuda de un emotivo y grandioso concerto de Bartók, después de haber visto los sueños de Akira Kurosawa que conseguí en debedé, dulce e cantabile, un montón grosero de ropa sucia detrás de mí, un par de mangas neo-nipon-épicos sobre la mesa cubriendo una docena de cuentas insaciables del Best Buy, H.E.B. y 7 Eleven et Walmart und Circuit City, una voz de padrino gracias al imprescindible y condescendiente AC, una mini colección de discos de be-bop, funk, música clásica marciana y rock progresivo, apiláh contra la pared; varios apuntes de comandos de SQL, programas en Cshell y referencias de Unix; unas negras bocinas de 60 watts conectadas al milagroso tocador de mp3 que me ha hecho un paro perronsísimo; una cachucha de barrendero con el logo de la Nasa; el parsimonioso celular que me regaló mi jefa ‘recargándose’ en el buró; 8 dólares en el bolsillo, unos 30 pennies horrendísimos junto a un mapa de Texas partido por la mitad; mis tenis planos casuales de 20 bolas, de cabeza con la estampa rellena de lodo consolidado; ‘siguiente’ a la puerta una hermosa bicicleta rojo brillante con las llantas sensiblemente ponchadas; el teléfono inalámbrico ‘ohne Linie’ por falta de pago, según; un switch en el cajón con 3 cables de red éter extendiéndose a los otros confines de la casa; la ventana posicionada para dejarme ver el jeep del vecino; los brazos y nariz quemados por el franco sol norteño; mi infaltable guitarra durmiendo en una esquina y yo rodeado de naguales como dice uno de mis bravucones amigos; me dispongo a referirles un relato corto, que comprende únicamente un momento, en una ciudad, de un país, que no es el nuestro (muajá) de una somera parte de la enorme cantidad de información a la quelqu’un se expone después de tres meses de vivir a su modo, lejos de lo familiar, y que he procesado, digerido y asimilado durante mi estancia en Reynosa y sus místicos alrededores.

Ahh, las chicas. He visto chicas hermosas, sí señor, pero más en Monterrey, nunca como en los Mochis. Pretty much normale, como en el defectuoso, las que están a mi alcance sont surplus anormale. No se si sea por el hecho de vivir solos, apartados de las familias, que las intrigas entre los de la compañía podrían armar una soap opera sin pex, ya que unos tiran cake a los otros, aunque la forma varía conforme a la personalité. Bastante real y dejavuense a la vez, es una convivencia un poco extraña, con muchas máscaras y modales, pero al fin y al cabo humana.

(Felicito a toda la banda que no felicité, escribo a todos los que no escribí y huggeo a aquellas personas que tengan un vínculo emocional bizarro conmigo. Espero sigan echando desmadre como se debe y les doy las gracias por chutarse esta carta conmimí)

Soy libre. Maintenant estoy a todo dar así. Aún no hay una mujer en mi vida (un besso li Rosarii) (la policía, dicen unos amigos por acá –me pareció bueno el término). Tengo varias amigas, mais non plus ultra. Hay una gran urgencia aquí porque me apadrine alguna. Vraiment increíble. Me dejaré? A ver cuánto dura.

No me puedo quejar, pues he conocido muchos lares en derredor, de los cuales listo encore Monterrey, El cañón de Matacanes (cerca de Cola de Caballo) – está de huevísimos, es el lugar más chingón que he conocido jamás (en cuestión de adrenaline-discharge), McAllen, Isla del Padre (la playa gringa), el skyline de Houston, la Nasa y varios pueblillos de Texas, 314 malls y platzas. Estoy planeando un trip a Lousiana, a la tierra del Jazz (New Orleáns) sólo necesito un puente de 3 días for the love of god.

Poco a poco me he ido sumergiendo en il mondo petrolífero de PEMEX del norte, cuenca de Burgos, Sabinas – GAS a quemarropa. Recuerdan aquellas clases con El Moroquín? Cuando hablo de repente se me salen algunos términos de petrolero con acento norteño y consultas en Oracle, como émbolo viajero, tr’s, gathers, dumps, navegación sísmica, segy, bbcs, mmbcf, bdps, paraps, supés y frappés, aggggh.

Tooooodo es muuuuuy tranquilo aquí. Les norteinnes se entretienen dando el ‘rol’ en la plaza, o cerca de los antros. Hay un par de súpers grandes donde también puedes ir al cine a ver la última muvi gringa. (I miss the cineteca ein bisschen).

Espero ir al estadio de vveisbool un día de estos, cuesta cuarente varos y no está tan lejos. Ya conozco un chingerísimo de gente, pero tengo pocos cuates. Además, como les digo todos hablan trés mal a las espaldas de l’outre. Backstabbers R US. Han habido varias pedas descomunales con los horrendísimos compañeros de slb que son hasta más pedotes que uno. Que orgullo. Ya no recuerdo a qué sabe la indio, pero pude comprar unas stout en el heb de mcallen y venden cerveza roja de irlanda aussi. Fue horrible.

El KFC aquí se llama Church’s chicken, sabe más feo, pero es más baras, y hacen unos elotes exquisitos – totalmente artificiales ich glaube. Están varios cafecitos cuchis para bohemiar, jugar dominó cubain, ver a las chuquis y hay como 3 restaurants acá, pero me duele el codín probarlos.

Casi siempre comemos en casa, ya sea que nosotros preparemos la comida o la mandemos pedir, tenemos 2 horas (de 2 a 4) para comer-echarla. Lleeeeeeenos de leche.

No se cómo le hice, pero convencí a la banda del cantón de hacerse de sus instrumentos respectivos, y la sala está ocupada por una batería raca pero nueva, un 5-string bass de 150 dólares que compramos un cuate y yo (nos fuimos a michas, por cierto este carnal se llama ‘Hammurabi’, hay otro wey que se llama ‘Primitivo’ – ces noms sont originelles!! Hasta hay un Pancho López jaja.), un teclado nuevecito que compró otro vecino y mi lira negra que es lo único que no es nuevo.

Al-hemdulilah, no he dejado de estudiar lenguas, ahora le estoy entrando un poco al francés. Por cierto, si alguien tiene el primer libro de café creme, mochilas plz.

La máquina la tengo full con casi todo el software en el mercado, que el día que caigan los que revisan las compus nos atoran a todos los que somos y todos los que estamos.

Para aquellos que quieran conocer estas tierras lejanas, hay harto room en my room, se pueden quedar los que sean, y no olviden traer la visa avec le passeport

Forever Autumn – de nuevo J

Joven Hooper
Quesque porque le doy un aire a Richard Dreyfus. Remember JAWS?"

Esta carta la escribí el 24-SEP-03 y la recuperé el día de hoy. Creo que nunca fué enviada...

"Sicker!', quoth Cassandra." - ToT

2004-12-28T16:09:00.000-06:00

I walked away from being a disgusting asshole and morphed into a second opportunity friend. And that crazy question of wonder... 'Why don't you do it?' they keep asking... Because I can do it, I will not... 'You will repent my young one...' said the elder. But the elder is sour inside...

I just had a big chicken club sandwich with a big cup of onion cream... *tasty*

Last night on the bus I was really worried cause I was coughing madly. Somehow the little flu that got me was getting worse, on account of so much partying... as Arce casually suggested haha... Nevertheless, Im getting better. Prolly because of the better weather at noon and maybe those teas me momma gave me helped aussi...

We've been maddeningly doin' nothin' to-day! We're planning to go take a quick look inside the Music Store late in the evening... Um ein Stomp-box zu kauf'n!! Not for me tho. Or maybe not... It closes at 6:30 pm...

Had a great party at our old house im Defectuose. En suite de boire... plus d'internationelles. Berns brought half a zoo of friends which along with our other half (me being the dragon) hit & burned the Shrek piñata a la Tláhuac. Later drank 9 wamas as punishment for the 'bullshitting dice' ... Loads of laughs and booze... Changui was ultra-drunk! Patrick was hyper-drunk! Jardeenya was remarkably-drunk... I was so high I did not recognize...

Wieviel kostet ein kilo Käse?

2004-12-24T09:55:00.000-06:00

"Suddenly everything started to make sense. My eyes compelled by darker thoughts to let the excessive moist come dry, so that my startled vision could grasp a wider and sincere view of the picture. I believe I started to see the facts just as she, from such a loveless point of view, so objectively pointed out, perhaps slightly influenced by tenderness and compassion, due to some latent effect that all my words and actions had had upon her.

Nevertheless, all my doings were on behalf of my love which was entirely hers, as selfish as true and so deep I could not remember a feeling so profound. Yet I wept little during all those days when, filled with hope and anxiety, my heart struggled to translate her words and understand their meaning, while waiting ‘patiently’ for her bold acceptance of my joyous self, by the time disfigured by the attentions I came upon and to her procured, acceptance in a way that nowadays I find to be a non possum endeavour as well as childish.

I learned so much and so little. So much of myself and so little of her. Or perhaps was it the other way around? Despite the obvious pain that the ego expells from such a rejection, oblivious to it, I praised myself and not entirely for this love so free, so charming, so unattached, so sad. The countenance she wore the day she looked into my eyes and said our love could not be, I cannot put astray. It binds my attitude with charm, my body with unsatisfied wanton madness. Perhaps not as passionate as utopic, my platonic dream in front of me, challenging all logic and reason, bringing forth together all feelings of lust.

My precarious tilting heart hummed softly with these memories, boasting my mind away in sincopated heartbeats, drenching my numb body with well-known life anew. I beheld.

Quidnam commisi? Maybe the lack of wrongness preceeded failure. A layout so perfect was not meant to succeed, not from the very beginning, as it had done at the end.

It remained complete, untouchable. Unattainable but blissful. Excruciating but hilarious with freedom. Edible."

(Lost love - fragment) JH - 2004

Cave canem!

2004-12-23T13:29:00.000-06:00

So I took the steps to derive from being a cute and lovely guy to a complete prick!

Go figure! No, better not.

Channeled some of these feelings into grinding metal and fuzzy power chords last night.
Ill spinned lyrics accompanied with a touch of improvised nu-postmodern-licks.
Trimmed fifths and sevenths drilled with a bit of impatience and newly acquired wisdom.

Another party at our place last night. Very slow hehe. Went up to talk on the phone with Arce and when I came down again, all guests had already gone. :-)

Went to el gabacho expecting to buy some gifts for the family, but ended up buying something only for my brother and Arce. Too many people, little time. Got the whole 'Bone' comic strip in a single book :)

Hp: 200 Sp: 200 $145000.- >

2004-12-21T09:37:00.000-06:00

Idling at the office... Last nite we partied till 4 am - Can you believe it? On Monday... Tuesday

As usual I was dancing like crazy with Ale and Mary while all the other folks drank & drank... and chiquitichat haha. Alice was there also, she's got two left feet. I feel I kinda blew it with her last night and feel like a jerk...

Der Nahual, Mura and Oswa are dying... You can hear their moans from afar and beyond their faces there is deep grief mit Durst gemischt. Eyes sunken, loss of color - they look pale though they are dark skinned...

The boss arrived 9 am to the office. Well, he's the boss. The boss's boss hasn't arrived yet. That's the way it is hmm. I'm cool tho....

There is a feeling of slowness in here... I switched iTunes to stream Persian music and that mixed with my drowsiness...

In other news - Last weekend was great! Went to Tajin with Chix! We hugged, sat and lay together, looking at each other, kissing, saying the sweetest things...

... being away from her gives an extra touch du coeur to memories ...

I ate a really good pozole at the Picnic in PR and watched 'Magnus Alexandros'. I liked it. I always like that kind of movies...

Christmas is now so close... and so is the end of the year... lurking ... I'm happy and sore.

XCII.

2004-12-16T19:00:00.000-06:00



But do thy worst to steal thyself away,

For term of life thou art assured mine,

And life no longer than thy love will stay,

For it depends upon that love of thine.

Then need I not to fear the worst of wrongs,

When in the least of them my life hath end.

I see a better state to me belongs

Than that which on thy humour doth depend;

Thou canst not vex me with inconstant mind,

Since that my life on thy revolt doth lie.

O, what a happy title do I find,

Happy to have thy love, happy to die!

But what's so blessed-fair that fears no blot?

Thou mayst be false, and yet I know it not.



- Shakespeare



I deeply fancied this sonnet. Brings up memories not at all 

times present and some yet not lived. :-B

I stand in sublime awe under the sky

2004-12-14T19:40:00.000-06:00

Wahooooooo!
I can't believe it still - I'm soooo happy :-D She said YES!!!
Can you die from so strong a feeling? I feel like I could... haha

( And in the back of my mind, mind boggling philosophy bouncing: "With great happiness comes great sadness" ) hahahaha

So I had a rollercoaster of a vacation. I was limboeing because of my longing feelings for Arce but nevertheless the trip was great! We climbed loads of ruins and stepped into many types of sand, took many baths under different sunsets, knew several types of gents and girls, food and sleep.

The outcome: my grandma was happy, my mother was happy, my father was grunting but nevertheless happy, and my bro was as usual hahaha and happy.

I loved it. Paradigm enhanced - vision entranced.

Last weekend I spent it all with her. Knew some of her friends. Met old ones too. It was good & strange at the same time *boggle*

Overall it was about 6000 km on the highway - drinking from life...

Wa Alhemdu-lilahi!

2004-11-28T18:46:00.000-06:00

Thank god!

I told her I liked her and that I was crazy about her!
She told me she likes me a lot too!! &8-S
But she just broke with her boyfriend so I'll have to wait... Btw she said I was part of her decision! 8-o
"Write me!" - I hope I find the means...

Something crazy happened. We were at the mall having a cold-coffee when we heard some shots in the hallway. Apparently some burglars stole a shop and Security was after them. We were locked inside 'Marti' for about half and hour 'for safety', 'till they found them. They got two out of eight...
Like 40 cops running, climbing upstairs, downstairs, carrying big Aka-guns and shotguns... Go figure! Finally they let us go.

Nevertheless, I'm going away on vacation, developing further knowledge about me country & meself, having fun with my elders.

(Hoping to lounge around with me old friends later today. Drink a couple of beers and have some pizar.)

Ego consisto mais no capito...

2004-11-26T14:45:00.000-06:00

Today 6 pm vacations begin! The boss went off to take a med and wont be back 'till afternoon. I truly hope I can slide away before he comes back. I'm supposed to give some advances on my project ce jour. Run! Run! Ruuuun!!

Downloaded plenty of mp3 in italian. Tiziano Ferro - Nek - Laura Pausini - Jovanotti. Mura found a page - He's supposed to be working on his GFE!

He estado mensajeando y escribiendo e-mails como pocas veces dans ma vie.
Arce dice que soy 'muy lindo' pero eso me suena a 'amigos' cuando lo leo. Veré sus ojos mañana, así tendré una aproximación 'a posteriori' (I beg you!). A veces me quedo pensando si hago esto por mí, por ella o por el 'sake'. Me estoy volviendo loco, mi almohada ya tiene forma de reloj de arena de tanto abrazarla 8^P No se que diria el pinche celular si pudiera al ver las caras que hago por cada mensaje que me llega de ella... y que escribo... jaja

Gestern nahm ich das Salem's Lot Buch bei King. Heute beginn ich ihn zu lesen. Höffentlich es beim letzten Tag meinen Urlaub zum Abschloss kommt!

Zwei kleine Rucksacken, iPod fully recharged, UnendlicheenergiesehrkräftigLEDenfuhrtelicht, my alter Cap, ihre Photo, Urlaub! Alles in Ordnung um beim Bus nach Heim zu fahren!

Wrooagh!

Ma belle demoiselle est malade...

2004-11-24T17:29:00.000-06:00

Last night I finally finished Dracula. It looked as thought it'll never end. The friggin' Count went to hell.

Arce wrote me in the morning saying she wasn't feeling well.
She says she's got a cold or something and that everything hurts.
I wish... I was with her.

She loved the LM song that I sent her.
She said she went 'spellbound & speechless' &8^D
"Voila beaucoup de talent!" God bless technology and you baby.

Today I tried her recipe: Oven cooked bacon rolled cheese sprinkled chicken breast filled with Piltzen & Spinach seasoned with garlic, onion and butter. Amazing! I get part of the credit as the cook ;-) The only missing ingredient was the flamed brandy on top but I couldn't find any at home *hic*

Incredibly sleepy after ich diesen incredible lunch 'gemanget' habe!
Myung, Rudess, Portnoy, LaBrie & Petrucci - keeping me awake.

Lots of work to do, nothing to accomplish... *wink*

Hilsen fra Mexiko!

2004-11-22T11:37:00.000-06:00

Wild & peaceful weekend!
Aye! How swift time flies when all of it's well spent.

James is married now :-) Gulp! He looked very happy. So did she.
I was an absolut stranger at the church in the morning, and in the afternoon when the party was over, ended up drinking rum with the family, dancing with the cousines and making stupid jokes haha. And I wasn't drunk d;-|> Well, a little...

At night I met with Arce 8^P We went to get a Mocca at the Jarocho in Coyoacan. Hugged her a lot, we talked a lot about music, her family, likes-dislikes, hugged her more. She was kinda serious... Was she nervous? :) Damn! I didn't get to kiss her... wroaaagh!
She hasn't replied since I left her Sat' night. I'm starting to worry...

Family reunion at our place: Long time no see :-) My beloved grandmas! It was great to see all of them. My little niece 'Pixi' is so funny! Them 'old' cousins and unclaunt from Morelia also *great*
Better than planned.

Got to see Pax, Berns, Sam, Ale & Changui - my blood & soul brethren.

Back to work. Lot's of pressure from me boss with the workflow diagrams.

Song sung blue...

2004-11-18T10:24:00.000-06:00

This small recording studio is so neat! 4 tracks is kinda enough! 8 would rock bigtime!
I wrote a new song for Arce. Mixed doumbek, acoustic lyre and wet vocals.
She liked it a lot! She says she likes my voice :-) Sent her kisses! XoD
Man that's something. Hope I can go to Taz's wedding, and hope she can be there too *sigh*
'Cause today one of the company's 'godesses' arrived um etwas am Samstag zu machen?! Genau mit uns!
Me Vagations are near. Let's hope everything keeps going smoothly.

Manger manger! Allons nous ou quoi?

2004-11-17T18:30:00.000-06:00

Went to eat. Prepared fried steak with lots of onion *schlurp*
Alex brought a huge bowl of Bolognese-spaguetten.
We drank Mura's specialty: Mango-strawberry water-juice.
*Burp* Slept for a half hour - sublime.

Started working on my project again. Still don't know where to begin.
*Untz-untz* Still I'm getting smart pouring nice colored cubes and arrows
into a ppt.

Must finish freakin' Dracula To-day! I'm planning to leave the office early.
Waiting for Arce to write. I hope my last e-mail wasn't too direct?
Funny how I keep clicking on the Gmail Inbox though it auto-refreshes.

Spero nos familiares mansuros.

E-mail lost in Limbo

2004-11-16T18:14:00.000-06:00

I wrote to Arce today what should've reached her yesterday.
I mumbled a few words on the phone to her. Man was I nervous!
Wroagh! I really miss her.
Gotta pay her a visit - pay her a visit.
Was denkt sie?

Neu blog im Welt

2004-11-16T15:23:00.000-06:00

Today I started my blog followin Pichin's advice.

I feel modern already.

What the heck! Let's go back to work.